In the bag

I almost feel I am pinching somebody else’s story here, but I’m going to tell it anyway.

One of the girls at school turned up at the office yesterday morning. Her shoulders were tense, her arm outstretched, her schoolbag hanging from white-knuckled hand, her face distorted with terror… you get the picture.

The school secretary ran through a series of possible scenarios in her mind and failed to guess what had come to pass. On questioning, the child announced in shaking tones that there was something in her bag. Something alive. Something that shouldn’t be there. Something…

…that looked very much like a mouse.

“Is that your little mouse?” asked the secretary. “It’s got a lovely shiny coat and it looks very well-fed and happy in your bag.” The silent response was all too clear to read. The child was certain that said mouse had had babies in her bag too.

I am happy to announce that the mouse in question has been successfully reintroduced into the wild, in the lowlands of Dulwich, in an attempt to save this critically endangered species.